Poem of the Day: Holiday Dinner

Hey, How y’all doing. Happy Thanksgiving and Merry Christmas, now that’s out of the way, where the food and shit? I came here for one reason. Once I finish eating then I’m leaving. Yea, we are cool and yea, I care about you. But today is the day that I get free food. Home cooked meals with desserts at the end. I’ve been waiting all year long so please don’t ruin this with your boring conversations and interrogations about my personal life. Yes, I’m still single and no I’m not dating. Yes, the kids are fine. Oh my they’ve grown so much since the last time you lay eyes on them. I’m not talking about my ex wife but yes, she does have another new guy. In fact, I have to go, I’m suppose to see her family tonight. Thanks for food and I really loved the sweet potato pie. I have to get going but I’ll see y’all another time.

On to the next house for round 2. The food is pretty much the same but I can’t complain. I won’t need to cook or eat out for the next week. This time around I think I’m going to need a drink in order to deal with this side of the family. Damn all the stores are closed, where can I go to get some alcohol. The gas station is open but there’s nothing in here strong except this tall as can of Four Locos. How they sell this shit, I’ll never know because it tastes so disgusting but will get you fucked up quick tho. Of course I bought it, I was under time constraints. I needed to be tipsy by the time I walked through their door…… I finally arrive and surprise, surprise, a barrage of questions coming from my ex wife. “Where have you been all day?”, she asks. And so I replied, “Mine your god damn business, in fact, where is your boyfriend at? Go talk to that guy.”. Then my daughter, her offspring asks the same thing. I told the little girl that I don’t answer to kids. She’s just like her mother, always being nosy and shit. I just came by to tell everyone “hi”. Now let me eat this food and go on with my life. I love you all and until the next time, happy holidays and have a good night.

On to the next house for round 3………

Moment of the Day

That moment when your daughter tells you that there’s a meeting at school and her teacher told them to tell their parents that if they are not working then they need to be there…..

I told her to tell her teacher to KISS MY ASS. I’ll go if I want to go. He don’t know wtf I got going on in my life. Lol then she says, “Dad, I can’t go to school and say that.” 🤣🤣🤣

Got to love being a parent lol