Monthly Archives: July 2017

Poem of the Day: Emotional Wall

Last year the girl I was with looked over my fence like Wilson did every time he was talking to Tim.  My emotional wall was built up over years until I finally let someone in.  Over a couple months it all came down then to my surprise the relationship ran into a dead end.  I saw it all coming like a bad accident and I didn’t bother to even get caught up in my emotions.  Though I was kinda pissed about how she did it I said ‘Fuck this shit!’ and went on about my business.  I was determine to build my wall up again so fuckin tired of dealing with females, I don’t know if I even want them as friends.  Never again, I’m not allowing anyone to penetrate my emotional defense.  Things never turn out for the good so what’s the point in even taking a chance.  To die alone a single man sounds like a decent plan.  I’m note sure if I will ever find romance.  

……..  As I write this I am still optimistic and I can imagine one day meeting the perfect woman.  One that gets who I am and allows me to be me.  She will be the one I tear down the wall for to build a life with.  She will be the one I will allow love to let in, until then, it’s just a dream in my head.

Homosexuality In 2017

As I sit and watch Sense8 on Netflix, one of the characters is an actor who is homosexual, but is afraid to reveal himself to the public.  He was worried about how his image and career would change if he told the world.  It not only makes me mad but also causes confusion in my brain as to why people care if someone is gay.  Love is the greatest thing in the universe and across the multiverse.  I believe love is what connects us all.  So who a person chooses to love, have sex with, or spend their lives with should not matter to anyone.  In 2017 if someone says that they are gay it should not be a shock to anyone.  It really doesn’t fucking matter.  Love who you want to love.  Kiss who you want to kiss.  Be happy with the person that makes you feel great.  I have two kids and I could care less if they deciding to date the same sex.  I am no one to determine what’s right or wrong.  But what I can do is show empathy, support them, and try to understand.  

I honestly don’t even want to use the term ‘gay’ anymore.  Why do we have so many words that are used to classify and label individuals?  I embrace the day that people no longer ask if someone is gay or not. But to be honest,  I am one of those people that asks that question.  Thus I need to make a change in myself first before I can see a change in the world.  A man and another man kissing should be no different than a man and a woman kissing.  Let go of the past and any ideologies that support hate and separation.  We are in the 21st century and we are still discussing race and homosexuality.  What the fuck is wrong with all of us? 

Poem of the Day:  Dear Sydney (Written in 2013)

I’ll never forget the first time I saw you. You looked into my eyes, they locked, and I never cried so much in my life. I was so shocked. I called your grandmother, my voice was weak. I told her “Hey, mommy, Im a dad. This is almost to hard to believe.” I held you close in my arms. So nervous was I, to the point I was afraid to ever let go out of my sight. You gave me a high that was a surprise. Now I have the honor of being the most important person in you life. I will never let you down. Tho at times I may not be by your side. Please know that daddy is doing his best to provide you a great life. I had a father to show me how to be a father and he told me one day that I will be a better father than he was to me. But he was great so I will try not to make any mistakes. I know sometimes Im hard on you and I apologize. Tough love was how I was raised and I feel its the best way to teach you how to survive. Our lives are difficult and I know you know that. You have daddy’s strength so you’ll never fall back. Only four years old and you’ve made me so proud. The way you handle things gives me a smile. And its ok that you lost your ear rings. Daddy will get you new ones. You know I will do anything for you. We’ve been through so much together over the past year. We saw each other cry and we wiped each others tears. Your an amazing daugther. I could not be a more proud father. I promise I will always be there. I love you, Sydney!!! 🙂