Ever since we got close nothing has been the same. I’ve been feeling deep emotions that I thought I threw away. Sometimes I get jealous and my paranoid thoughts send me into a rage. But I keep it to myself locked up in a cage. Though I do apologize for that day I let it slip away. This is still crazy, I can’t believe I’m even feeling this way. A rarity it’s been that my heart has sent me into a whirlwind of different emotions. A bunch of shit I’m not used to dealing with. I’m usually calm and collected. Never see me be affected by anyone’s actions. I’ve kept that shit hidden. Lately I haven’t and I’ve been off my wagon. My mind’s been doing jumping jacks trying to jump over the madness. Master of my own reality but prisoner to my thoughts. I’m in control of my emotions until the minute I’m not. I’m fucked up and I got issues. Every outburst is clearly my fault. None of this would even happen if I would just accept what’s happening. My heart is afraid cause it doesn’t feel the same and my brain is going insane. I’m falling in love and I never wanted to feel like this again because love is pain.
The past is the past. I leave that shit behind my ass, as I walk the path of the present on the road to the future.
Shout out to all my exes and any female I ever messed with. This is for all those women who did me wrong and disrespected me. I grew strong through every situation. I laughed in the face of rejection and battled through the Great Depression to come out on top. A better man than what you remember. I took so many chances, followed my heart and had different romances. None of that shit turned out to be long standing but I’ll keep playing the love game until I find The One. The past is the past. I leave that shit behind my ass, as I walk the path of the present on the road to the future. Contraditicing as I say this cause it sounds like I’m holding grudges but I’m just saying thank you to those you provided me with life lessons. I cherish every moment and grateful for all my blessings, appreciate all the minutes and seconds I spent with them.
There is only one thing in this universe that can determine who you are and what you will be in this life…… AND THAT IS YOU!
Don’t ever rush anything in a relationship. Just because you move fast it does not equate to a quicker happy ending. Enjoy the journey, the struggle, and the process. Great things always comes to those who wait. Be patient.
I swear at any moment I could snap, if one of these wack ass customers ask me another dumbass question. They testing my patience and I’m wondering how much of it even still exists. The bullshit that I have to listen to is baffling. My ears are still ringing from the sound of his voice, it was so damn annoying. Corny people coming in night after night this is all part of my job so I should just shut up and work, right? Fuck that and fuck them. Fuck her and fuck him. I hate cooking and I hate customer service positions. People always griping and bitching about what they didn’t get. Telling me about their personal problems, like bitch we are not friends. I’m not hear to listen to you vent about how your job sucks, I got my own issues to deal with. Just tell me what you want and we both can go about our business. The longer you talk the more you hold up the line. These other people are hungry too. We don’t have the time to stand and chit chat about this and that. And yea, I think your cute but I’m not about to flirt back with you cause I’m stuck here at work and I got shit to do. Plus someone already occupies a space in my heart, I’m taken. So I must refuse your advances. I’m ignoring the subliminal signals you keep sending in my direction. I don’t come to your job and ask you a shit load of questions. So show some respect for me and leave me alone while I make your fucking breakfast. I only make eye contact when I’m taking your request or handing you your food because I don’t want you to get confuse. And think that we are about to be two dudes just chilling. Naw, it ain’t happening. Say your order, shut the fuck up, take your food, and the get the fuck out of my face. And lord help you if you dare ask me for some shit that’s not on the menu. You got life fucked up, that’s not something I’m about to do. I don’t care if the last fool hooked you up and did it. I’m not the one. How many times do I have to say it? This is my constant frustration and the daily emotions I go through everyday at work. Surprise, surprise I have yet to go berserk. But just wait and see……..
Sometimes life sucks, but while driving on this road I realize it’s a long ride and gas cost too much. I make the best out of a tough situation. Rough times with pressure applied turn into diamonds, not a cubic zirconia in disguise. Tears of joy in her eyes when she cried and describe what her life would be like if she decideds to marry me. Happily ever after is how we plan to be a successful relationship seems like a fairy tale dream. Meanwhile crack fiends live their lives in deceit constantly lying to love ones about the drugs they use and abuse. In life you loose if you choose to be subdued by a substance you can’t refuse. Everyone’s an addict