Am I A Nice Person?

The other day I was having a conversation with someone I have the upmost respect and admiration for. During the conversation I questioned, “Why am I a nice person?”. I’m nice because I feel it is the right thing to do. I’m nice because it makes me feel good to do nice things for other people. But if I’m honest with myself, it’s not that often that I’m nice because I genuinely care about other people. Yes, I do nice things for my family and friends, those I deem close to me. I do nice things for them because I cared about them and their well being. But sometimes I do nice things for them because it makes me feel better when I’m down. Give positive energy and you will receive positive energy. Make sense, right?…. I try to be nice because I don’t want to be a mean person. But when I am mean I enjoy it and that scares me a little. I’m nice enough to give someone money at a gas station, but only so they will leave me alone and I don’t have to hear their story. Is that even being nice? It makes you wonder. Does it even matter what the reason is behind a positive action just as long as it has a positive result. Am I really a nice person? Or do I just like the feeling I get when I do something nice for others. Or maybe I’m just fucking crazy as shit, I’m not sure anymore lol.

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