It’s love I desire. I aspire to find someone you will love me unconditionally for all of eternity. The love I seek is the love you see that happens on tv and lives in Disney movies. In search for my Bonnie, I’m looking for a queen. A woman who will stand by me with more or equal strength. I once believe that my dream was a reality but then time passed by and I realized that stage of my life was only a hurdle on the road of my journey. As I can continue to drive down my path that I have chosen to take, I pray for the day I find her on my way. My life is good without her but with her it could possibly be great. Don’t make the mistake that I need her to supply me with happiness. But if I had one wish I would wish for a woman who loves me beyond our final kiss.
This is an honest assessment of myself as I navigate the dating world at 30…..
I am so damn lost and confused! I’m not sure if I know what I’m doing at all. And I’m almost certain that everyone else has no fucking clue as well. You see when I meet someone new a million different thoughts goes through my head. I often comtemplate what are the best words to say. How do I say or texted them? Am I speaking too much about myself or am I not asking enough questions? Shit, am I asking too many questions? It may be simple for some but for a person life myself, who over thinks and analyzes every situation, the journey of dating is a wild, unpredictable, and unsuccessful adventure.
I’ve come to learn that I am who I am. As stubborn as that sounds, but I will live and die with the person I see in the mirror. By that I mean I will not play the “game” when it comes to approaching a woman. I have no ulterior motives, such as, me speaking to a women in order to attain sex or sexual pleasures. When I find a woman that I am attracted to and I feel the vibe is right I will engage in conversation in order to become more familiar with her. I want to know who she is on the inside. You see I struggle with small talk. To be honest, most of the time I would rather not speak to people. But when I do speak I like to have meaningful conversations. Unless, I am talking about sports, video games, or rap lyrics lol. I am not a smooth talker. When I speak it’s honest and genuine. I do that because that is what I will like in return. But having this approach can be too much for some. Or I am just pouring it on too much in the beginning. Either way it’s safe to say that when it comes to dating I have a hard time with the first step, and that’s the opening introduction. So you can imagine I don’t get far with most women.
Now to add on to my unusual approach to women I also have two kids and an ex wife. Either of which are a complete turn off for some. A woman will either be ok with me having children but not like the fact that I still have contact with my ex wife or they will not like the fact that I have kids…. Are you confused yet?
To say it’s hard out here for me to date is an understatement lol. Sometimes I wish I could just go on one of those dating shows and have women compete over me. Then again, those don’t seem to work out for people either. I will keep pushing forward and keep my spirits up high. I’m still very optimistic about my dating future. I am also realistic as to my chances of finding someone at this age and stage of my life. Currently my bar is set low. I just want someone I can take out to dinner, watch a movie, and go on trips together. Like is that too much to ask for in this world?
I will keep you all posted about this subject. Hell maybe next time I write about this I’ll have good news. I mean, you never know what may happen right?
What happened to us? What happened to you? Things seemed so right, you were the love of my life. Then shit went wrong and now I can’t even stand the sight of you. I’m wondering was I the fool to even fall in love with you. I thought it was going to be us against the world, just us two! I loved you more than I could ever admit to. I thought we would be together forever. That’s what marriage is suppose to be. But it didn’t work out, no reason to place blame or bother with apologies. The past is the past, it’s just that, history. We both moved on but it still seems like a sad love song or story. So much love held and now it’s gone……
The person you love should be the reason you are happy but not the reason for you happiness…… 🤔
I don’t believe in God but I think you are a gift. Your presence is evidence that he exists because I swear that you are heaven sent. I asked the universe to send me the perfect person and then you appear so this can’t be a coincidence. We got way too much in common, it’s obvious that we belong together. A strong bond we formed in moments is solid and I pray that it will never be broken. When you laugh, I laugh. And you when cry, I’m sad. I feel what you feel, all the good and the bad. They say opposites attract but I don’t know believe in that. But whatever this is, I love this shit. We are the perfect match!
I love you. I’m not afraid to tell you but too afraid to show you. So my affections I never display, it’s all confidential. Incredible how fear can make you hide and deny the inevitable. Everyone knows and can see the look in my eyes. They read the poems I type. Hard exterior but a sensitive guy inside. A walking lie, I get emotional during tv shows, I cry. More than words is what you deserve and what you need from me. No matter how many times I speak I need to put into action so you can see, when I say that I love you, it’s real. Honesty is one of the best qualities of me. Please have faith and always believe in me. My word is bound……